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Bible Translation...
On this page we will be slowly translating and re-writing the Bible.

Currently the Bible is very difficult to read and understand. Most of it does not relate to current

Some people think it is wrong to rewrite the Bible.  How many times do you think the Bible has been
rewritten in the past.  People have been putting their own spin on this thing for centuries.  We're just
adjusting it for the times.

Verse King James Version New & Improved Elucidation   Legend
John 2:7-10

7. Jesus saith unto them, Fill the waterpots with water. And they filled them up to the brim. 8. And he saith unto them, Draw out now, and bear unto the governor of the feast. And they bare it.
9. When the ruler of the feast had tasted the water that was made wine, and knew not whence it was: (but the servants which drew the water knew;) the governor of the feast called the bridegroom, 10. And saith unto him, Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine; and when men have well drunk, then that which is worse: but thou hast kept the good wine until now.

7. Jesus told them to refill the empty wine bottles with water.
8. He then told them to service the water/wine to the Master of Ceromonies. 9. When the MC tried the wine he asked the groom 10. why he saved the best wine until after everyone was drunk.
Jesus always brought the best booze to parties.  So he was invited to the best parties.  After a while everyone expected him to bring the booze, so he just stopped going.   Bob = God
John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. Bob sent his only son (Jesus) to earth, so that whom ever believed in him could be saved. Jesus saves. There's a problem with this one. According to this book, there were many people around back then that believed in Bob. I'm pretty sure most of them are dead now.
This is where "Jesus Saves" comes from, so let's put it in.
Joshua 20:1-3

1. The LORD also spake unto Joshua, saying, 2. Speak to the children of Israel, saying, Appoint out for you cities of refuge, whereof I spake unto you by the hand of Moses: 3. That the slayer that killeth any person unawares and unwittingly may flee thither: and they shall be your refuge from the avenger of blood.

1. Bob told Joshua, 2. "Set aside safe houses, 3. where anyone who accidentally kills someone can hide out from the cops". We're knocking off 3 here.  We're on a roll.  
Revelation 16:1 And I heard a great voice out of the temple saying to the seven angels, Go your ways, and pour out the vials of the wrath of God upon the earth. I heard the great voice coming out of the heavens saying to the angels, go out and spread the fury of Bob upon man. God has nothing against the earth. It's man who is the cancer on the earth. Always manipulating and distorting everything for personal gain.

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